Better Not Cry! Why Kids on Santa’s Lap Could Be a Retailer’s Latest Liability

In the long list of cherished holiday traditions, few are as enduring as parents taking their kids to see Santa at the local mall or retail store. Every year, over 18 million children call on Santa, according to the cultural blog Atkins Bookshelf, and 70% of malls and shopping centers employ one, as per NationalSanta.com. So enshrined is the ritual that even the threat of Covid couldn’t halt it. According to YouGov data, in 2020—the year Christmas was all but canceled—nearly one in five American families still braved the microbes to see the man in red.

But while the institution of visiting Santa may be impervious to change, the nature of that visit is not. For many parents—especially those who came of age in the MeToo era—there’s a growing unease with letting their kids sit on a stranger’s lap.

“It may be time to reassess the potential harm this tradition may be doing to children,” read a recent essay in Nola Family magazine. The New Yorker has declared: “The patriarchal male lap has become an inherently vexed zone: a matter for H.R., the subject of inappropriate propositions, a key word in bombshell testimony about the misconduct of powerful men.”

For marketers, this anxiety takes on a chillier dimension: is Santa’s lap a liability—legally or reputationally—for my brand?

The answer: quite possibly.

“It’s essential for department stores and organizations hosting Santa visits to understand and address the concerns of parents in today’s cultural landscape,” said Melissa Agnes, CEO of consultancy Crisis Ready Institute. “Adjustments like having children sit beside Santa instead of on his knee are a step in the right direction.”

“While I have no data on this, I think it’s safe to say more companies are practicing defensive medicine overall,” said veteran crisis-management veteran Eric Dezenhall. “If there’s one chance in a million that Santa turns out to be a creep, is it worth it? Just don’t do it. That’s the thinking.”

Have a seat—actually, don’t

Santa’s lap as a possible trauma zone is not an easy topic to raise, of course, and it can be difficult to gauge retailers’ level of concern or whether they’ve modified their rules as a result of them.

“We are going to kindly pass on participating but thank you for thinking of us,” wrote a spokesperson for Neiman Marcus, which has an in-house Santa in its Dallas flagship.

A representative for the International Council of Shopping Centers said: “We have not heard of any changes in this practice.”

But clearly, the awareness is out there. At the Mall of America’s Santa Experience, for example, the online explainer promises a “unique, safe, and private interaction” with Mr. Claus.

Most pointed is Macy’s renowned Santaland, which occupies 13,000 square feet in the Herald Square flagship and draws 200,000 visitors a year. A visit to the FAQ section makes it clear that personal boundaries are store policy.

“Guests will visit Santa as he sits on this throne,” the page reads. “You can choose to sit next to him on his throne or on a red gift box nearby. … Santa will not be able to hold children on his lap.”

Psychologist Dr. Sandy Wurtele, who’s authored several books on keeping kids safe, is encouraged that some retailers are waking up to what she calls “a really important and timely topic.”

“I’m fully aware of the changing norms around the Santa visit and applaud the changes,” Wurtele told ADWEEK. “They demonstrate how parents can respect their children’s wishes. I cringe at the pictures of kids crying while sitting on his lap. I vote for alternative ways to engage with him.”

Maybe just put the kids in charge?

And how do the Santas themselves feel about this issue? James R. Kelly, president and CEO of the IBRBS (formerly the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas), says that while he hasn’t personally seen a difference in parental opinions about lap thing, Wurtele’s “alternative ways to engage” have always existed and he’s always practiced them.

“I let the child dictate how they feel comfortable,” Kelly said. “Some are timid and wish to stand near Santa. While others run up to Santa and jump right up on his lap.”

The guidelines posted on NationalSanta.com echo Kelly’s sentiment. “If your child is afraid of Santa, never force them to sit on Santa’s lap,” reads the site. “This can be a very traumatic experience.”

“I’m with the mall Santas on this—let the people choose,” said Mike DaRe, president of brand strategy and communications firm Smarts. “People have become accustomed to personalized experiences. Making kids sit on Santa’s lap or denying them the opportunity to do so seems like an odd hill to die on in either direction. Listen to your consumers and give them the choice.”