Last year, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos tweeted a picture of himself at his Mars 2018 conference, walking alongside one of Boston Dynamic’s Spot robots. Now, a toy company has provided a super-detailed, posable action figure of the world’s richest man, which you can conceivably find, purchase, and keep in your home for reasons we have yet to discern.

A company called Ntwrk, a “mobile-first shopping” app, apparently sent the toy to a bunch of tech journalists, although I can’t seem to find any more information on this particular toy, which is perhaps a good thing considering it is disturbingly creepy.

In the meantime, I have questions. Twenty-seven of them, to be exact.

Photo by Andrew Liptak / The Verge

• Why does a super-detailed, posable action figure of Amazon’s CEO exist?
• What ill deed did we do to deserve this?
• Why was this sent to me in the first place?
• Who thought this was a good idea?
• What was the pitch meeting for this product like?
• Who was in the room that approved this concept and began development?
• How do you go about acquiring the likeness of the world’s richest man to produce an action figure?

Photo by Andrew Liptak / The Verge

• Was Jeff Bezos consulted at any point in the design and development process?
• If so, what were his notes?
• What was the expression on Bezos’ face when someone brought up the topic to him?
• Who was the first person to tell Bezos about this?
• Did Bezos get one of his own?
• If so, does he still have it?
• Why is it so jacked? (That one may actually have an answer.)

Photo by Andrew Liptak / The Verge

• Why does it have bulging veins?
• How accurate are the muscles, and what access was provided to Bezos to ensure their accuracy?
• Who would buy this?
• What level of Amazon / Bezos fan do you have to be to buy one of these?
• If I bought one, where would I keep it in my house?
• Is this something my child should play with?

Photo by Andrew Liptak / The Verge

• Can I buy the Spot robot without the Bezos figure?
• Bezos has tweeted pictures of himself playing with other robots. Will there be a follow-up release?
• Will it come with other accessories, like a scale version of an Amazon Echo or a Blue Origin rocket?
• When commercial space travel becomes more widespread, will someone bring toy Bezos into space?
• If Toy Story were real, what would his relationship be like with the rest of the toys in Andy’s room?
• Should I commission a miniature Star Trek: Next Generation costume to turn it into a low-rent Jean Luc Picard?
• Why do its eyes seem to follow me when I walk across the room?

https://www.theverge.com/2019/7/14/20689217/amazon-ceo-jeff-bezos-action-figure-boston-dynamics-spot-robot-ai-why-questions