“Guests will visit Santa as he sits on this throne,” the page reads. “You can choose to sit next to him on his throne or on a red gift box nearby. … Santa will not be able to hold children on his lap.”

Psychologist Dr. Sandy Wurtele, who’s authored several books on keeping kids safe, is encouraged that some retailers are waking up to what she calls “a really important and timely topic.”

“I’m fully aware of the changing norms around the Santa visit and applaud the changes,” Wurtele told ADWEEK. “They demonstrate how parents can respect their children’s wishes. I cringe at the pictures of kids crying while sitting on his lap. I vote for alternative ways to engage with him.”

Maybe just put the kids in charge?

And how do the Santas themselves feel about this issue? James R. Kelly, president and CEO of the IBRBS (formerly the International Brotherhood of Real Bearded Santas), says that while he hasn’t personally seen a difference in parental opinions about lap thing, Wurtele’s “alternative ways to engage” have always existed and he’s always practiced them.

“I let the child dictate how they feel comfortable,” Kelly said. “Some are timid and wish to stand near Santa. While others run up to Santa and jump right up on his lap.”

The guidelines posted on NationalSanta.com echo Kelly’s sentiment. “If your child is afraid of Santa, never force them to sit on Santa’s lap,” reads the site. “This can be a very traumatic experience.”

“I’m with the mall Santas on this—let the people choose,” said Mike DaRe, president of brand strategy and communications firm Smarts. “People have become accustomed to personalized experiences. Making kids sit on Santa’s lap or denying them the opportunity to do so seems like an odd hill to die on in either direction. Listen to your consumers and give them the choice.”